I first started living in this apartment in 2011. At that time I was paying about $525 plus electric which was pretty reasonable in the summer months as I do not use my A/C for the most part. Now the time has come to renew my lease again and they want me to pay $625 a month plus electric and water. Generally this would put me close to the $700 mark, in a good month. This puts a tight squeeze on my budget. Most people would say this would be a good time to find a new place to live, especially since I’ve been hankering for a cat. But the logistics involved in moving exhaust me just thinking about them, and that is not to mention the financial costs involved, which I can’t afford. To top this off, my Aunt says I may need a roommate. Most people would shrug and think “Well if I need a roommate, I need a roommate.” The thought of a roommate makes me want to cry though. When first read my Aunt’s email, that is what my first reaction was. “Nooooooo! Why?!” I was tempted to write back, “I will NOT have a roommate.” Instead, I sent a bland email simply telling her when I had to let the landlord know about my lease.
I feel like I don’t have the time, energy, or money, to coordinate a move. It makes me anxious more than usual. Trying to keep up with my current work load at work, which I need to do in order to pay my bills, and then trying to deal with a move on top of that…I want to cry. I barely have the time and energy to keep my apartment in some kind of decent order. I feel like I can barely settle in one place because of either financial or emotional reasons, and now I have to potentially deal with moving and not only that, moving into a place that is not completely my own? I know what my Aunt says I should do, but what is right for me, what I want, is different. I do not want a roommate. And yet it is ridiculous to pay so much money for a rather unspectacular but serviceable apartment. The part of me that knows I should do the senseable thing and find a more reasonably priced apartment is being overruled by the part of me that wants/needs to do the easy thing of staying put.